Here’s a Scenario:
A heated argument between an angry driver and a taxi driver, at an intersection, while waiting for the traffic lights to change. A woman sitting in the backseat of the taxi, tensely listening to the two-way verbal abuse.
The angry driver gets out of his car, launching a barrage of verbal abuse at the taxi driver who sternly replied, “Watch your language, there’s a lady in the car” to which the angry driver replied, “I don’t f*#^.en care you *&^%”.
The lights change and they drive off.
The woman in the back seat, who said nothing throughout the incident becomes agitated and annoyed with one of these two men. Which one do you think she was upset with? The angry swearing man or the taxi driver?
The taxi driver!
Why, because he said, “Watch your language, there’s a lady in the car”, which is supposedly benevolent sexism. Or a cognitive pattern of ideas, mnemonics?
“She felt the angry guy should watch his language because his behaviour was wrong, not because she was a woman and her sensitive womanly ears would be damaged by his words and certainly not because she was a lesser, more delicate human.”
Benevolent sexism is defined as positive prejudice that appears as favourable when it in fact casts women as weak creatures needing men’s protection as in this example.
I think, women can twist a situation to suit their needs and this can distort the real event. Did the woman consider:
- that the taxi driver may be from the generation where, this was a sign of respect
- or he may have felt she was at risk in someway
- by airing her views online instead of to the driver, is a common “womanly way of handling the situation”
- that women whether we like it or not, are physically, the weaker sex
- what if the angry man jumped in the back seat, would she expect the taxi driver to save her given the notion she didn’t need a man to protect her
Benevolent sexism occurs when the perceiver judges themselves as being judged, therefore demonstrating a response inline with their beliefs and frames of reference.
I think it’s time we woman took a good hard look at ourselves as “women”, not as a comparison equal to men.
Think about what we are teaching our sons who may, no longer treat a woman with respect, nor open the door, give up his seat, stop and help if her car gets a flat tyre at night, nor hug their daughters for fear of being labelled or worse, not help if you are being attacked in the street. Todays choices will be tomorrows consequences.
We may well create a generation of “Affectionless Men”….:(